Weekend Box Office
So... just like every other blog in the entire world, I'm going to spin my own whimsy over this weekends top 10 films at the Box Office. It's not original but nothing ever is...
1. Spiderman 2 - This movie so completely erased the first one, it shall be forever know as Spiderman and we can all forget how bad Macy Gray lamed up the first one.
2. Fahrenheit 911 - I didn't see it cause... well... I don't care. There. I said it. I don't care. If you want to see a big, opinionated jackass, you should look up above at my schedule and follow me around in a hippie van.
3. White Chicks - I'd rather see "Garfield."
4. Dodgeball - I haven't seen this one either but Ben Stiller was already mediocre as this character in "Heavyweights."
5. The Notebook - Zzzzzzzzzzz
6. The Terminal - Tom Hanks plays Balki from Perfect Strangers and Peter Scolari plays with Mark Linn-Baker.
7. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban - Seeing as how the second Harry Potter was exactly the same as the first Harry Potter, I will not be seeing the third Harry Potter.
8. Shrek 2 - What's the message from Shrek? It's not that love is blind. It's that love isn't blind and in order for love to work, one person has to change completely into an ogre and live in a swamp. That's not a message I want my imaginary kids seeing. Thus...
9. Garfield - See my blurb on "White Chicks" above and then shoot me in the face.
10. Two Brothers - Movies about Tigers are as exciting as movies about people called "The Notebook."
Now... stay tuned, loyal readers as I can only improve. It's hard not to top this shit.
1. Spiderman 2 - This movie so completely erased the first one, it shall be forever know as Spiderman and we can all forget how bad Macy Gray lamed up the first one.
2. Fahrenheit 911 - I didn't see it cause... well... I don't care. There. I said it. I don't care. If you want to see a big, opinionated jackass, you should look up above at my schedule and follow me around in a hippie van.
3. White Chicks - I'd rather see "Garfield."
4. Dodgeball - I haven't seen this one either but Ben Stiller was already mediocre as this character in "Heavyweights."
5. The Notebook - Zzzzzzzzzzz
6. The Terminal - Tom Hanks plays Balki from Perfect Strangers and Peter Scolari plays with Mark Linn-Baker.
7. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban - Seeing as how the second Harry Potter was exactly the same as the first Harry Potter, I will not be seeing the third Harry Potter.
8. Shrek 2 - What's the message from Shrek? It's not that love is blind. It's that love isn't blind and in order for love to work, one person has to change completely into an ogre and live in a swamp. That's not a message I want my imaginary kids seeing. Thus...
9. Garfield - See my blurb on "White Chicks" above and then shoot me in the face.
10. Two Brothers - Movies about Tigers are as exciting as movies about people called "The Notebook."
Now... stay tuned, loyal readers as I can only improve. It's hard not to top this shit.
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