Back.

What the hell happened? The last time I updated this was in 2007. Seriously. What happened? I just tried to sign up for a WordPress page. What is that? I have no idea. I got an email from them and signed up and now it exists but I don't know how to use it. I swear I didn't just wake up from a five year nap. At some point, technology and social media got together and fucked and made a baby that just punched me in the dick as it ran by me.

Seriously. I also signed up for a Tumblr page. I have even less of an idea of what a Tumblr page is than I do a WordPress page. Am I the oldest 28 year old person on the planet? I have no idea what to do with a Tumblr page but I have one. I don't know where it is or what it's called but I signed up and it exists somewhere.

I signed up for Blogspot in 2004 when I was young and spry and because it looked slightly more sophisticated and sounded less effeminate than a LiveJournal. Remember them? That's the speed I run at. LiveJournal speed. Write your little entry and then put a little smiley face or a frowny face depending on whether you feel smiley and frowny.

I've already given up on my blog's resurrection before I've even finished writing. I believe that's what the kids call "Fail." Am I pronouncing that right? "Fail."

I have a Twitter account but I don't use it very often. Sometimes I do but it tends to drain the battery in my phone. Blogger asked me if I'd like to learn how to Blog from my phone? No. I certainly would not. "But you could take pictures of things and post them and then write about the pictures?" I could but I will not.

Goodbye for eight more years...